I am not a religious person. Not at all. I even have an aversion for dogma. But I’ve recently come to realize that there might be more than just flesh and bones. Furthermore, faith has proven to be powerful and necessary in some situations. So maybe it works. I am a seeker, so why not try?
Here is my attempt to talk to… God? However, that is such a loaded word and would open the debate on whether or not He exists. Ancient Sanskrit scriptures call it « That », which is closer to what I imagine, a kind of huge immaterial world we will never really have access to. But I can’t talk to a « That ». I need something more personal. That is why I think, if I had to believe in something, that I have a sort of protector, like a cosmic baby-sitter, who has been looking after me my whole life, sending me signs and trying to guide me through life. He is like a friend. This is it.
I am not very good at this. I don’t really know what to say, nice to meet you? I should thank you before anything else. If you’re my guardian angel, you have done a pretty good job. I see the signs and I’m trying to listen as much as I can. You are generally clear; you’ve been good to me. I have been very lucky.
Although, no offense, but it seems you’ve gone on vacation lately. Is it summer time up there? I do not blame you, we all need a break from time to time and I bet you’re busy. But see, it has been a mess in my derisory life these last few months. I can tell you are still here, watching from a distance, because some things have eventually made sense. Yet you might be ill or something because the path is not as clear as it was before. I hope you’ll get better very soon because I have a lot of dreams, plans and hopes for the future. I’m sure you’re already aware of that.
You know, one of them is to actually be happy. I mean content, satisfied with what I have. Another one is not to feel lost and helpless anymore. I need your help with these two quite quickly. It’s been a while now. I know I should have talked to you before, but you want me to be happy too right? So if you don’t have any more ordeals in store for me, I would like to move on. Don’t get me wrong, I am happy with where I am, to have lived what I lived, to have had the chance to change and grow. The lessons I’ve learned during all this are priceless. Yet it is all a bit foggy. I still don’t totally understand why you made me go through this. I usually see the signs so if you could send me one a.s.a.p., it would be great. Avoid too early in the morning though, and also around 11.30, there’s Drop Dead Diva on TV. Otherwise I’m all yours, ready to receive your almighty guidance.
I am looking forward to hearing from you.
Yours respectfully and lovingly,